To my family and friends, thank you for taking the time to find your way to this humble corner of the internet that Juliet’s Birthday List would like to call home. With the big day fast approaching, I’ve had time to reflect on the importance of this event, and what it means to me personally.
You see, one of the first memories I have stored deep within the warmest parts of my hippocampus is that of my third birthday. I remember specifically thinking, man, this is my favorite birthday. Much better than my second. Which means, naturally, that at that young age I could totally remember back to my second birthday, though I can’t now.
Hippocampus (pictured above)
And now it’s Juliet’s turn. Will this be the greatest birthday she ever has? The choice is ours.
Samantha recently (and quite by accident, I assure you) sent out a pre-first draft version of a birthday wish list outlining a few items that without any great effort one could’ve likely assumed naturally. The purpose of this blog is to serve as la maison de la créativité. That is to say, one should read this list and walk away feeling inspired, humbled, and with sense of purpose. Some of you will be traveling–not unlike the wisemen to the baby Jesus–to celebrate with Juliet in person, and others, unfortunately will not be able to see her (maybe ever). Regardless of who you are, I invite you to take a look into the future with me:
(NOTE: As always, we must ask that participants refrain from presenting Juliet with anything haunted or otherwise cursed. Once, Samantha believes that a spirit aligned itself with a toy we had in our old home. The identity of this spirit or its dark motives have never been revealed, but some ancient astronaut theorists believe that spirits can lie dormant within an object for years, patiently awaiting the presence of another like-minded spirit to come within range, at which point the dormant spirit awakes. Do any of our worldly possessions contain such an entity? I think you’ll agree it’s best not to test our fates on such an important day).
(ALSO NOTE: While this list may seem extensive and Christmas-list like, it merely exists to provide ideas. Does she need everything on this list? What in life does one need?)
MEDIA
Juliet is no stranger to the fine arts. Growing up in our culture-rich post-Rolling Meadows society has given her a taste of la bonne vie, and there’s ever a shortage of that with which we entertain in our household.
All that remains
When it comes down to brass tacks, we’d rather her receive toys instead of movies. Here are movies, though:
DVDs or Blu-Rays:
– My Neighbor Totoro
– Any of the Toy Story’s
– The Nightmare Before Christmas
– Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
– Classic Looney Tunes Collections
– A Bug’s Life
– Up!
– The Incredibles
– Fantasia/Fantasia 2000
– The Emperor’s New Groove
– The LEGO Movie
– Wreck-it Ralph
– Paranorman
TOYS & THINGS
Like any child, Juliet spends the vast majority of her waking hours in a make-believe imaginarium reenacting various fanciful adventures with what little she has.
And, while as parents we can’t be there to entertain her directly, we can fund her creativity by supplying her with a new range of toys:
(NOTE: Samantha has suggested Barbie related paraphernalia. And, while she’s entitled to her opinion, this revised list reflects my attitude towards her suggestion)
– Mr. and/or Mrs. Potato Head
– “Leap Explorer Games” ages 3-5 compatible with a Leap Pad II
– Dolls/doll clothes. Anything in the Disney Princess/Disney Jr. lines would be put to good use.
– Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles toys
– Cthulhu related items
– Toy appliances
– Glow-in the dark stars for her ceiling
– Puzzles (age appropriate)
– Magnet letters/numbers for alphabetting
Will she be forced to play with this blue string forever?
CLOTHES
Sometimes, the greatest gift of all is just clothes.
– Socks. She always seems to lose socks. Other than this she might actually currently have enough stock.
– Dress-up clothes. Juliet’s at this age now, and this would be fun, one would think.
MISC
Yes, it’s true, Juliet’s only a toddler. Does this mean she can’t legally use cash and gift cards in business transactions? I have no idea. What I do know, is that this should not bear any weight on whether or not you are able to give these to her instead of the above suggestions. I personally know that Juliet understands that money exists, as she often tries to convince Samantha and I to leave stores with her to-be purchases without getting in line to buy them. Should you have read through this post and thought, “No”, then I’d encourage you to explore this as an alternative option.
Thank you again for taking the time to read this. I know many of you would’ve kept reading, had this gone on for a few dozen more pages (and believe me, early drafts of this post did indeed run that long), but I’ve decided to present a list that fits within the confines of reality to some large degree. Will her 3rd birthday be the greatest day of her life? Time shall tell.
The Glass City 